I wake up this morning In a synagogue, No this isn't weird to me, i live here. Even though my parents are Crazy Born Again Christian (those jump around sing and scream Jesus people) Pastors, and remind me I'm heading an unholy road each day.
So to make my day more eventful, I decided I was going to take my brother to Chuck E Cheese, he's a fun one to take out, it's like unleashing the TaZ, whirlwind of fun.
Oh yes I am 15 years older than my brother, my brother will be 4 December 26, my mom got remmaried no need for further explaination. Took my neighbors with me to ChuckECHEESe, my non jew ones, fellow hispanics.
First of all I hate this RAT. We step in and my brother is fascinated by the black light. Like no lie made us stand under it to see those numbers stamped on our hangds in case we steal another Child.
Why anyone would want an extra child idk, if I were truly evil, I would leave mine there.So we spend about 15 of my brother standing under the black light in awe.
He sees the wonder that is Chuck E Cheese's and attacks runs like a madman around spending his coins like crazy! Jumps on everything unleashing a full day's hyperness. The little guy is strong so luckily we are in public and he has some decency to not jump on me as usual.
Time for prizes, he is so cute that the girl gives him the 300 or more SpiderMan bubble set for his 40 tickets, no fit or anything he just asks. I'm scared for when he gets older ooo boy!
Then off to Dunkin Donuts in search for Dorney Park Coupons, he spots Pink Frosted doughnut, wants, i buy as he steals those little Baseball hat bowls straight from the display stant. I pretend I can't see as to avoid a fit, and tell him I paid for it so he doesn't learn to steal.
I'm a bad person who lets my temp kid steal things, Honestly I dont wanna hear him cry.
No coupons, next stop Wendy's. Score! Oh no Issac wants a frostee, and I kinda do too, two frostys! "I WANT WATER" Sweet Lady gives him water, my inner hispanic automatically speaks spanish to her, but of course she is shes working at Wendy's.
Fast Food in urbanated suburbs = Hispanics work there. Deeper into the suburbs its okay for White people to work there.
"QUIERO PAPAS" Uh back to the line baby wants fries. The little kid is skinny, he needs food to hide the bones."NOOOO PAN!"- In Baby Issac Language this means he wants a Hamburger, plain no ketchup or anything else can touch it or he will throw a fit!
My friends see some old HS friends, Baby circles around them like a vulture eating fries in a creepy way, starting them down and showing them his burger.
The sugar has all caught up he runs around wendy's jumps on a booth Chair thing and pretends to ride it screaming "AYYY HORSEY, GO CABBALLO" in true hispanicness spanglish.
Then proceeds to hug me stick his hands down my shirt, i yell at him, he grab my boobs, great another guy obsessed with boobs! Second time hes done this.
Time to go! He tricks me telling me he has to poopie, he lied!
Gets in car and passes out instantly, even snores, ahh peace :)He is so cute when he is sleeping. I drive around for an hour in a borrowed car, Honda Accord from a fellow hispanic as all hispanics have old Hondas including Minivans.
I enjoy driving this small car, even though i must hold the high lights on with my finger, being as I am in the suburbs and might kill a small animal, again (oops RIP Racoon Parents). The windows must be manually rolled up, there is a puerto rican jersey that the passenger's seat is wearing,
I must individually lock the doors, and I covet this car that will make me a true ghetto hispanic instead of a true ghetto hispanic soccer mom who drives their parent's Honda Minivan.
Day has come to end, Park in front of synagogue, Lock all doors manually, hide key under mat for owners to drive away with, pick up sleeping baby, close door, SHIT! LOCKED CAR WITH KEY INSIDE!
Get home, parents get home from church even in connecticut, of course Church an hour away on a wednesday, its normal.
Trys on my sisters clothes to see what to wear for tommorow, my mother has had 3 kids is over 40, looks 27 maybe, 116lbs 5'6. I'm jealous. We are both jealous, Clothes fits her better than my 10 year old sister. who isnt fat at all, just has a weird Geicko thing going on.
Someone Farts, I think it was my sister, my room smells like shit :P. The room that got taken over and I now share with my little sister seeing as I have left for college
1 week, 6 days Own ROOM, Own BATHROOM
"Absence makes the Heart Grow Fonder" I need to Leave so I can go back to loving them....
"Out of sight, out of mind"- and forget their Foolishness
Word of the Day
- Fellatio - a word that sounds expensive and tasty(Like gellato) and could be ;)
credit to my future Neighbor Carlos, who shared with me his favorite words of the English Language, the second being Fallopian Tubes (although that would be 3 words) and to Christian who revealed to me my true Hispanic ways.
and poor Ruth and Andres who had to endure this night
